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Do..Wear your underwear

"You must do the thing you think you cannot do" Eleanor Roosevelt

What a quote...one of my favorites, for this chicken little of a girl from SC. Quoted by a woman that clearly did many things she probably never fathomed. I can be quite fearful of a lot of things, and so Sunday night, I dove head-first into one of them.

For the first time in a looong time (and I mean long), I attempted to write a song with two of my dear friends. We have been discussing the act of writing for a long time, and I always find a reason to push it back.

It scares me to death, its like standing in front of a bunch of people with your underwear on..people you don't know, that you particularly don't want to be seen by in your underwear either..and the underwear is probably not the best ones you own. Yep, that sums it up perfectly...

So, we ate and visited and then retired to the living room, and then he pulled out his guitar, and she pulled out her computer, and I braced myself for the shots from the firing range..I started to sweat..(I don't sweat unless I am working out really hard). And then we started talking and he started playing, and we started CREATING..and it was joy and passion and it felt wonderful. Because, as my crazy friend Billy says, "we create because we were CREATED"

And the beauty of it was...I forgot about being scared. I let go of my fear, and afterwards I felt lighter, and whole, and I could feel God smiling down on me, saying "that's my girl". What feels better than that, knowing your Creator, your Father is looking down on you and being pleased, because you left your fear behind and lived in what He CREATED you to do, even if it was just for a moment?

And it's Tuesday, and I was one big ball of anxiety today...work, stuff, etc., it all gets to us, it gets to me. And we FEAR...and push back the things that we are CREATED to do.

But, I want to continue to exist in the passion of what I was created to do, which is many things, but most of all, it is to live my life without fear. With courage, and PASSION...LOTS OF PASSION. Because passion cannot be manufactured, people. And believe me, it is contagious and easily recognized, and it draws others in, like a moth to a flame.

What do you think you cannot do? You probably CAN do it..give it try.

And if you are scared, I will stand beside you in my underwear too..

Pockets

It is very easy to look at the injustices of the world and the disasters that are swirling around us, and start to get very overwhelmed. If we stand underneath the umbrella of poverty, global natural disasters, war, genocide, AIDS and the many other factors that leave our world broken, we can start to wonder if we will ever make a difference and even put a dent in these issues.

I am starting to believe there is an answer to this burden, and a tangible way for each of us to really make a difference in our world.

Find a pocket... And what I mean by "pocket" is simply this: find something you can directly put your hands to, it may be in your own community or through a global network. Something that may seem small to you, may be the one factor in changing the life-path of another human being forever.

I talk to people all of the time that feel as though they have to do something BIG to be significant and the more I work in the social profit sector, I see that the answers for change aren't always in the BIG IDEAS. Yes, there are people who birth visions, and they grow into movements that really do cause a shift in people's thinking and actions, and this in turn, changes society. But, not everyone is a visionary and is meant to do something on a grand scale. And the sad thing is that our world is conditioning us to the fact that in order to "count", you have to do something big....AND IT IS JUST NOT TRUE.

Find a pocket in your world and start right there. Maybe you have a heart for children, have you ever heard of Big Brothers, Big Sisters? Minimum commitment, and the possibility for greatness is virtually endless. Or sponsor a child through Compassion, or World Vision. What it would cost to have a great dinner can sustain a precious boy or girl somewhere in this great, big, small world...and these organizations are FULL OF INTEGRITY AND TRUTH.

Maybe it is even simpler than this...maybe it is stopping and getting breakfast or lunch for the homeless person near your job, and actually having a conversation with them. Acknowledging their life by giving them a few moments of your time, and a hot meal. Or, serving a single mom or dad in your life with babysitting so they can have a night off.

Let's get even simpler, what about your co-workers, your boss, your family...just speaking words of kindness into their life, and having extra patience...what if this was done by us every day, the possibility for change is ENDLESS...in this little pocket.

So, I hope you can see that there are pockets of possibility all around us for making the world a better place. There are enough charities, I honestly don't think the answer lies in starting another one. I truly believe that the answer for changing our world lies in our own hands, in our own worlds, in our own pockets.

What will you do?

Copper John...

If you go to Little Five Points In Atlanta, you find a small man there named John. He has skin the color of hot chocolate, with a gray beard and chances are he will be wearing brown Converse high tops. He sells his jewelry there, necklaces and bracelets made with gold, silver and copper wire formed into intricate pieces. Some holding precious stones, and rings that wrap delicately around your fingers. He is an artist, he is homeless, he says he "retired" from crack after nearly half a lifetime of fighting that addiction.

I googled him tonight and the photos are of a very different man than the one I met yesterday. His eyes twinkle now, he is not as gaunt as the pictures show him to be. Hope is etched into his face.

I believe in divine appointments, and yesterday was one for me with Copper John. He was one of the last to come in for shoes at the Distribution in Atlanta, and I knelt in front of him to fit him for shoes. He was dressed like an artist, and around his neck hung a long charm with a black stone. While I fitted him (he chose the Brown Converse sneakers), I asked about the necklace, and 10 minutes later, he brought some of his treasures down for me to see.

He told me how his jewelry literally had healed him, and kept him alive, and that after years of being addicted to crack, he decided to "retire", and is going through a rehabilitation program in Atlanta. His voice, his face, his body language, EVERYTHING showed me someone who had been lifted out of a dark pit, and he KNEW it, and was grateful for it. He also is keenly aware that God has gifted him with a talent to create beautiful things that can be worn, and what a story to share to someone if you have a piece of his craft. "Copper John made this, let me tell you about him"

I cried, of course, and hugged him after I picked a bronze charm with an amethest stone. And I hugged him again, and held the moment close because moments like this don't come around every day. Again, they are DIVINE. I was mindful of my moment with him, and chose to sit in it, and be blessed by this sweet man who had overcome so much.

This morning as I left Atlanta, I had to pick something up that I left at the mission, and as I turned at the light, Copper John crossed the street, with his rolling backpack, headed to work in little Five Points. I rolled down the window, and called to him and he smiled that sweet smile. I pulled over and got out, and spent 10 more minutes with this precious human being. I told him "John, you were my reason for being in Atlanta". We hugged, and smiled, and talked some more. I left in my car with tears just rolling down my face, so thankful that he walked in and got some shoes, and left me with SO MUCH MORE.

I can't truly verbalize what those moments are like, I just hope and pray the few of you that read this are able to have those moments in your lifetime.

And if you go to Atlanta, and stumble upon little Five Points, find Copper John. Take home a bracelet, necklace or ring. Listen to him and see the light in his eyes, and you will leave with something precious. I promise...

Disaster Relief for Fleetwood Baptist Church, Cottondale, AL-Your help is Needed!

Hi Everyone!
I will be traveling down to Fleetwood Baptist Church in the Tuscaloosa suburb of Cottondale, AL, Saturday June 18th. I worked with them the Saturday after the tornado and I am returning to help some more with tornado relief clean-up, plus I will be staying over and leading their worship service Sunday, June 19th. This relatively small church is very dear to me, I watched this congregation run meals and much needed supplies in the wake of a horrible disaster with so much passion for their community, love and energy. They are an official distribution center in the community (one extremely hard hit by the tornado) in spite of losing a congregation member in the storm, and having physical damage to the church.

I want to bless them when I return. They have given me a list of items needed for their community relief and my plan is to take a JAM PACKED Soles4Souls SUV down to Tuscaloosa. But, my dream is to have to rent a UHaul to drive down everything that your generous souls will donate.

If you donate items to Hope4Souls, a new division of Soles4Souls that provides miscellaneous items to our partners in need (toys/books/children's strollers to name a few), I can make sure that you are provided with a tax receipt for your donation. Fleetwood Baptist is an official distribution partner with Soles4Souls.

I will need to have the items by Wednesday, June 15th so that I can determine my vehicle situation. You can get them to me in a variety of ways:

Hopepark Peeps:
You can deliver them to Andrea Harris-Kenney and she will get them to me (just include your Name, Address, Email and items donated so that I can get a tax receipt to you)

Local to Nashville, you can drop the items off at:
Soles4Souls Headquarters: 319 Martingale Dr. Old Hickory, TN 37138

Out of Townies, you can also ship these items to:

ATTN: Tiffany Johnson
Soles4Souls
319 Martingale Dr
Old Hickory, TN 37138

Thank you in advance, for whatever you can contribute! I will be sure to send a follow-up email of how the weekend goes! The items are below!


FLEETWOOD BAPTIST CHURCH RELIEF SUPPLIES

SCHOOL SUPPLIES

PAPER, folders, binders, etc.
Wide ruled notebook paper
Marbled Composition notebooks
Spiral notebooks wide ruled
3”x5” index cards, ruled and plain
Plain folders (red, blue, greed, yellow, orange, purple)
Dividers with tabs
Multi color construction paper
Copy paper
2 inch three-ring binder
Mead primary journals

Pencils, crayons, markers, etc.
#2 pencils
24 ct crayons
24 count Crayola crayons
Washable Crayola markers
Colored pencils
Black sharpie marker
Highlighter
4 ct Expo Dry erase markers
Scissors, glue, etc.
Packs of glue sticks
Fiskar scissors
Small Elmer’s glue bottle
Cleaning supplies, paper goods, bags etc.
Kleenex
Liquid hand soap
Baby wipes
Quart sized Ziploc easy zipper bags
Gallon sized Ziploc easy zipper bags
Wet Wipes
Germ-X hand sanitizer large size
Sandwich bags
3 pack paper towels
Brown lunch bags
White lunch bags
75-ct Clorox wipes
Misc.
Plastic pencil box
Pink erasers
Clipboards
Plastic shoe box
4 ct crayola washable finger paints
4 count classic color play doh
Sugar free singles drink mix



KITCHEN AND BATH SUPPLIES
Kitchen kits:
dishes
pots and pans
silverware
glasses
kitchen towels/dishcloths
kitchen utensils

Bath kits:
towels
washcloths
shower curtains
shower curtain hooks

*ONE SPECIAL REQUEST-They are in need of about 250 clear backpacks, and I am working on it....but this is greatly needed for back to school and they HAVE to be clear!

A Beautiful Beginning

I love it when my day starts like this. I just got a phone call from a lady in the Southeast that reached out to us a few weeks ago in need of a pair of shoes. We try to fulfill individual requests when we can, although it is not always possible. This precious woman is in Cardiac Rehab, and was in dire need of a pair of athletic shoes to continue her therapy by walking on the treadmill.

I sent the shoes to the Cardiac Rehab Dept. in care of her nurse, and they came back…so we resent them and the hospital even called, unsure of where to deliver them. Each setback I was able to intercept… (Providence is indeed a lovely thing) and today, she called me…

The lightness of her voice, her excitement as she told me of how well they fit, and how she was able to begin walking on the treadmill was absolutely “golden”. She just exuded joy…and was so grateful, so thankful, that she had new shoes to continue her therapy in. She also promised me a photo of her on the treadmill.

I ended the call with two assignments for her: to continue to strengthen her heart to get better, and to PAY IT FORWARD (Little did she know she JUST DID by calling me). And she laughed excitedly and promised she would.

All of this was from a simple pair of shoes. Or, better yet, from the fact that this person felt loved and cared about, and the tangible gift of a pair of shoes communicated to her that she IS loved and valued…and from that, JOY AND HOPE was heard in her voice. And felt in my heart.

Yes, what a great way to start Thursday, June 2, 2011.

Dot Connectors

Sometimes I end up on the phone with people that I may never directly work with, in a conversation that could last 20 or 30 minutes, merely connecting them with other networks or individuals that could be a better fit, or solution to their initial reason for reaching out. Often, our conversations and meetings lead to a future relationship that proves to be valuable to both of us. But I am learning that no connection, meeting, introductory email or phone call is EVER a waste of time....it is a DOT that we will connect eventually to something else.

A few years ago I had the privilege of meeting an amazing woman who started an apparel company to benefit non-profits all across the US. I saw her shirts at a local festival, and went back excited about the prospect of the possibility of having shirts made for Soles4Souls. This actually happened, and in the process, Ruth and I built a relationship from the start...mass production of t-shirts or not, we developed that connection.

She is now building her brand and moving to Nashville, and it is so exciting for her! Our friendship is growing, and each time she is in town, we have dinner. When she was in town over a month ago, she was telling me of an upcoming visit to Jerusalem to see her daughter and family, and I mentioned that Soles4Souls had recently partnered with an orphanage there to distribute shoes. She suggested that I "connect" her and the Orphanage Director, and I sent an introductory email. As providence would have it, the shoes arrived on Easter Sunday..about a week before she arrived, and Ruth ended up staying just minutes from the orphanage.

She was able to go and meet the sweet boys, see their shoes, and capture their thankfulness, energy and excitement! She sent pictures of her visit, and was so touched by the experience. In a later meeting with the Orphanage Director, Ruth discovered through connecting the dots of relatives and friends, that HER OWN UNCLE was responsible for installing the air conditioner units in the orphanage she visited! They had a plaque in his honor, and Ruth was able to take photos of this, and share this experience with her Mom (that was HER BROTHER). Ruth got teary-eyed telling me, as I did too!

WHAT.. A.. SMALL.. WORLD..

The point of my story is simply a POINT....A DOT. We are dots, so WE NEED TO CONNECT, and WE WILL CONNECT IF WE LET OURSELVES! Every relationship, business contact, email....answer it, foster it, grow it, AT LEAST TO A POINT...you never know what may happen...it may not directly happen for you...but it was such an enormous blessing to be the line between those DOTS, all the way in Jerusalem, at an orphanage for neglected boys. An adult businesswoman from Chicago was able to see what her family accomplished in her homeland...all because of a DOT.

Pick up your pen and connect the dots, what are you waiting for?

The Miracle of Growing....

My Momma has a green thumb...or more like 10 green fingers, hands and arms. The woman can grow some beautiful flowers and plants, she just has a gift for making beauty grow out of little roots, castaway plants or tiny buds from Lowe's. It is really amazing to me.

And I have noticed that once in a while there is a plant that nothing seems to work on, and all her usual tricks of the trade just doesn't help the plant. It just doesn't grow the way she hoped it would.

One of my favorite verses in the Bible is 1 Corinthians 3:7 "So neither is he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth". In the Message translation, it say that God is at the "center of the process" of making things grow.

As humans, we can put forth all of the effort we want, use our God given skills and gifts, and have intellect, knowledge and expertise, but if God's hand or favor is not in the growth of it...maybe that is one reason why it is not growing.
I know that statement could open up discussion and differences of opinion.....sometimes I really don't understand why God does what He does, or better yet, why we do what we do.

But this verse is also a comfort to me too. That the sole responsibility of something growing to its fullest potential is not entirely on my shoulders. I plant, and I water...but then God will come down to my situation and at the center of my process, grow it as He wants it to be grown. Sometimes it dies, or maybe it grows strong roots....it could flower for one season or every Spring, regardless, He will grow it in His own way for His Glory.

And there is always a story too, when my Momma and I walk around her garden. She has a story about each plant, and its process of growth, or why it didn't grow and what worked and what didn't. And she uses each experience to make her a better gardener. And every plant she has, she pours everything into it she knows to do...because thats what you do when you plant a seed.

Those Watching Over Us...

"To feel the love of people whom we love is a fire that feeds our life. But to feel the affection that comes from those whom we do not know, from those unknown to us, who are watching over our sleep and solitude, over our dangers and our weaknesses-that is something still greater and more beautiful because it widens the boundaries of our being, and unites all living things" Pablo Neruda

I love this quote, I found it MONTHS ago, and took a picture of it from the magazine I found it in, because I didn't want to mistype it at all. Directly being loved by someone we recognize (family, friends, etc) is a powerful force....but giving and receiving love to and from those unknown to us is powerful. It is as though we cannot accept it, we don't know what to do with it. And as we give it, it feels very different from directly giving love to those we know personally. I see it a lot with my role at Soles4Souls, hearing the stories of feedback from our partners as they describe people's response to receiving a new pair of shoes. People are taken aback that someone wants to provide them with something they need, and YET...there is no connection between them other than being two humans.

As a believer, I love this because it directly parallels how it feels when God loves us....I am overwhelmed, often wait for it to be taken away (because it is just too good to be true), and then I am just in awe that Someone so big would love me. And I feel mysteriously closer to Him through that.

I read this quote too, and I think of all of the "caregivers" of our world-the soldiers watching over us, policemen, firemen, teachers and yes, I realize that in this great, big world we are interconnected....through love. And that makes me just say wow. Thats the best word I can find for it right now.

What I Learned in Tuscaloosa

The tornadoes came and left their marks behind....and in a matter of hours we were hard at work at Soles4Souls trying to get items of need to the victims of the horrible storms that pummeled the South. I started to google shelters in the Tuscaloosa area and learned that the University of Alabama was an emergency shelter. The very first person I got on the phone was a sweet voice that belonged to Judy and she was glad to see shoes coming her way for the students and individuals that lost everything. In one day, we had items on the way to Cullman and Tuscaloosa via Soles4Souls staffers and our partners at Cross Point Church.
And on Friday, April 29th, I headed down to Tuscaloosa myself. I had connected with Judy again, and wanted to survey the needs firsthand. Saturday morning I met her on a peaceful road right outside of town and followed her into utter devastation. Her husband is the pastor of a small church of about 200-300 people in the Cottondale area. We pulled up to a church that had severe roof damage, no electricity and power lines down all around it. But inside, there was an army of men, women and children mobilizing supplies, making meals and supporting each other.
Judy and I loaded up the Soles4Souls-mobile with food, toilet paper and cold water and began to drive around neighborhoods and deliver items...I was not prepared for what I witnessed. I have seen damage by floods and hurricanes, I have seen Haiti, with its chaos and overturned buildings still in shambles. This was unlike anything I have ever seen. Entire neighborhoods wiped clean...people walking around just picking up whatever scraps of their life they could identify. Strangers cutting through limbs and trees to clear streets so that people could get out. Foundations with homes that are no longer there....just a concrete slab. Trees popped in two like toothpicks....it was surreal, heartbreaking and breathtaking...

But it was also one of the moments in life that ground me, and how thankful I am for the moments....When I realize all that matters is what we give in this life, not what we take. And again I was reminded of how grateful I am for my job with this amazing organization full of people that are passionate about changing lives. Thankful for people like Judy, that through providence answered my call and invited me to join her and the congregation of Fleetwood Baptist as they served hurting individuals all day long. MINDFUL of the fact that every meeting, every email, every phone call is a chance to truly MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

7 X 70

I love Chris August so much, he is an amazing singer/songwriter and I have downloaded several of his songs and appreciate his honest lyrics and completely unique voice....and you can hear his heart in every note.

And today, I heard his song "7X70" for the first time, and it completely unglued me...just wrung out my insides. I just love Jesus and I am so forever grateful to Him for loving me JUST AS I AM, and being with me unconditionally...and I am just falling more and more in love with my God. And this morning I was reminded of how wonderful God is to break through strongholds in our lives, to give us strength to forgive, sometimes not so much for the other person, but in order for us to receive true freedom through the power of having wrongs made right by someone bigger than us.

And then I heard this beautiful song..... I wish everyone could hear this song. And know the freedom in forgiveness, and the beauty in asking for it, and coming in truth and humility to the end of ourselves....and the feeling of being redeemed (ESPECIALLY when we don't deserve it...aah, we really never do...) And knowing we are loved by our Creator...who loves us lavishly...

I believe it is such a powerful message that I have to post the lyrics.

7X70

I've been living in this house here
Since the day that I was born
These walls have seen me happy
But most of all they've seen me torn
They've heard the screaming matches
That made a family fall apart
They've had a front row seat
To the breaking of my heart

7 times 70 times
I'll do what it takes to make it right
I thought the pain was here to stay
But forgiveness made a way
7 times 70 times
There's healing in the air tonight
I'm reaching up to pull it down
Gonna wrap it all around

I remember running down the hallway
Playing hide and seek
I didn't know that I was searching
For someone to notice me
I felt alone and undiscovered
And old enough to understand
Just when I'm supposed to be learning to love You
Let me doubt again

7 times 70 times
I'll do what it takes to make it right
I thought the pain was here to stay
But forgiveness made a way
7 times 70 times
There's healing in the air tonight
I'm reaching up to pull it down
Gonna wrap it all around

I lost count of the ways You let me down
But no matter how many times You weren't around
I'm all right now

God picked up my heart and helped me through
And shined a light on the one thing left to do
And that's forgive You
I forgive You

7 times 70 times
If that's the cost I'll pay the price
7 times 70 times
I'll do what it takes to make it right
I thought the pain was here to stay
But forgiveness made a way
7 times 70 times
There's healing in this house tonight
I'm reaching up to pull it down
Gonna wrap it all around
Yeah, I'm gonna wrap it all around

I've been living in this house here
Since the day that I was born

Soles4Souls-Prom-A-Thon @ Studio 615

What girl doesn't love the Prom and getting dressed up? Soles4Souls had the opportunity to be involved in XClusive Moments Dress Me Prom-A-Thon on March 27th, 2011 at Studio 615. Over 90 Metro Nashville students were chosen to receive a complete Prom Makeover, including a dress, shoes, jewelry, hair, makeup and professional pictures by a photgrapher. It was quite a day, these young women who normally could not afford a nice prom dress and shoes got to experience the red carpet treatment!
Soles4Souls provides shoes for men, women and children all over the world, and some people might look at this and think that this is not an immediate "need", but if you had been there yesterday, you would understand how very important our role was in this event.
We always say that with shoes, we give HOPE. And I saw that yesterday, I saw HOPE in the eyes of young girls and their Mom's, as we fit them with sparkly prom shoes and ooh'ed and aah'ed over their beaded dresses.

We gave them HOPE...
...that they are special
...they they're worth it
...that they are beautiful and of value to many

I helped one young lady with special needs practice walking around in her high heels, and as we neared the mirror, I made her look up, and see her reflection, her beautiful smile...and I SAW hope.

I was there 7 hours, running around like a chicken with my head cut off....When I left last night, my feet were tired, my body was tired...
...but my heart was full...of HOPE.

And I remembered my first prom. We couldn't afford a fancy dress, so my Great Aunt bought my Mom material to make me a dress. And I was afraid I wouldn't fit in because my dress wouldn't look like the other girl's dresses. We lived in government housing, and my neighbors always sat on the porch, which could be quite embarassing at times when they asked my friends for a dollar...

But my Mom worked so hard on my dress, and the big day came...and my dress was beautiful, all of my neighbors told me how pretty I looked when I came out the front door with my date...and at the prom....although my dress was home-made, it was so beautiful, and different...and I felt special, and I had...

Yep, I had HOPE. And I still do.

Give HOPE to someone today....in whatever way you can...

Worship Night at Hopepark

There are just moments that you try to write about and no matter what you say, it never seems to capture it and do it justice. Last month I had the opportunity to be a part of a Night of Worship at my church, Hopepark. It is different from a regular service, it is just music, and some speaking and Scripture reading, but it is definitely a night for people to come out and come together as a community of believers and sing and worship.

And that is what we did...and it was beautiful, and the only word I can find to accurately describe the tone of it is VERTICAL. It was a unique group onstage, and all of us have our niche, and we all came together and put our egos and agendas and ourselves aside, and just worshipped, and used our gifts as a vessel for God to move through. Even before it began, you could really sense the presence of God there...which is correct, because the Bible says, "where 2 or more are gathered in His name, He is there". But sometimes He is there...and then sometimes HE is THERE...whoa, and you know it, and you feel it, and it is just big and huge and vast...and you just walk away feeling so blessed.

But its crazy to me...I have been a part of many services, many dynamic nights....but this night, on this night, I have never sensed the presence of God as powerfully as I did. It was so thick that at times I felt like I could have reached my hands out and spread it apart so I could see into it.

It was just breathtaking...and a moment I really didn't want to leave. And honestly for the few days I think many of us there we're still basking in it...

I want to share the lyrics of a song that immediately came to my mind as I left that night...

"In The Room"
The church is empty but I just can't go home
So I linger for a moment in the dark all alone
And I'm so overwhelmed at how your spirit moved
I'm just glad
I was in the room

So many stories and no one knows but you
The silent prayers answered tonight in these pews
And I don't understand how you do what you do
I'm just glad
I was in the room

Great God in heaven
How wonderful you are
Oh you're still changing lives
And it humbles my heart
That you would allow someone like me
To play a small part

So tonight as I stand here I'm reminded once more
That when any good happens it's not about me Lord
It's enough that I stand in the shadow of you
I'm just glad
I was in the room

Pictures worth a thousand words...

You look at pictures and see much more than what our eyes gaze at. We see stories, moments in our lives, we feel things....get tickled because we can remember exactly how we felt, what it tasted, smelled, looked like...all from a little photograph. It conjures up a lot. Here are a few of my favorites...

To Love Yourself...

I used to think it was very self-absorbed to hear people say that you should love yourself. I believe in Christ and I guess I've always felt like if I loved myself, then I wasn't adhering to Jesus's teachings, because he tells us to deny ourselves and take up His Cross and follow Him, and to love Him first, and then our neighbor.

But, I have come to realize to truly love yourself is what God would want anyway. He loves us, He made us, and we are His Creation, and we should love what He has created and ordained. So, to love ourselves is to love God, in many ways.

There are moments that we will feel truly loved by many. And there are moments where loving ourselves will bring great comfort, because we will feel as though no one else truly loves us. In those times, we have to be love for our own heart.

And I am realizing that the better we love ourselves, the better we can love others.

So, what am I really saying, "It is OK for you to love YOU"

But I want to do something that really matters...

I hear this all the time, it screams inside of me quite frequently also, and for GOODNESS SAKE, I work in the non-profit sector, in a job I adore, that is more than employment for me, it is quite a God-Spot, a calling. But I have people all the time, of all ages, come up and say "Do you have any positions open? I really want to do something that matters"

And I have some thoughts on this....thoughts that have been cultivated in the mundane, the waiting seasons, the times of complete despair in wondering what was next for me.

My thoughts (if you care): EVERYTHING you do matters.

I understand how being in a job that does not directly connect you with humanitarian or ministry-minded tasks can make you feel like you are not "making a difference". But what about your co-workers, children, family members, neighbors and friends, and frenemies....your circle of influence. This is your calling, your time is here and now, not a future moment of greatness waiting to be discovered, but the minutes that make the hours, of the days, of the weeks, of the years that make YOUR LIFE.

Wayne Elsey, the CEO and founder of Soles4Souls, was a shoe executive, and decided to help people overseas that were affected because of the tsunami. He didn't wait until he started a non-profit to help others. Gwen Herod, my Sunday School teacher, who was a victims advocate for County Government, did her job by day and spent her weekends pouring her life and laughter into young twenty-somethings at Westside Baptist Church. Alexander Diaz, a Puerto-Rican American citizen, worked for a UPS Store; collected 160,000 pairs of shoes to give to charity, while he mailed packages and made copies and graphics in his Massachusetts store. Amy Lowry, a dear friend and stay at home Mom, is raising two beautiful girls who will change the world, and she leads worship at her church and pours her life into women from her church family. Jennifer, my hair stylist, gives me a head massage and washes my hair and speaks softly and gently to me, and her love is felt the whole time she makes me hair pretty. My friend Lisa Marie, a hospice nurse, makes people in their last days comfortable and gives families support while they leave this world, she is a beautiful singer and often sings to them. Lorenzo, the janitorial staff person at my church, makes you feel like a million bucks when you see him on Sunday, he is always dressed to the nines, and he picks up empty coffee cups, and church bulletins on the floor in between services...with great joy.

I could keep going. But I won't. I understand how life can look very different at times from how you imagined it. I understand how you can feel that your presence here is quite insignificant, especially when compared to others. I. GET. IT. (trust me)

But I also know the beauty of our purpose here, and that is to love God, and love others first, and pour our life into the world around us. Leave it better. Leave your mark, and be open to whatever that may be, even if it looks different from your "vision"of it. Stay humble, and remember that the small stuff really is the big stuff.

Shoes Help Bring Some Peace to Afghanistan...

I received an email from a military mom in late October 2010 because her son, Staff Sargeant Beaudrie of the 2/101 Airborne, told her of the conditions in the villages near his post. As a gesture of goodwill and to possibly promote peaceful relations between the soldiers and the Afghan people, her son wanted to get some shoes sent to him to distribute to the children.

As I read her email account of her son’s story of the distribution in the little village, I am absolutely humbled by the fact that not only were the shoes needed desperately for the children’s safety, health and well-being, but they were indeed an instrument of peace between the soldiers and the villagers.

Staff Sergeant Beaudrie asked the children (with the help of an interpreter) to line up in an “L” shape so everyone could see, and let 3 children at a time come up and pick out new shoes. As word got out, more children showed up to receive a new pair of shoes and meet the new “Hero” of the village, the American soldier bringing the gift of shoes. These shoes were brought to the village children, the forgotten ones in all of the conflict during the war in Afghanistan, and although some of the parents and children were skeptical of this offering, afterwards they were clearly delighted with their new shoes.

Although some of the commanding officers were not in favor of the idea of distributing shoes, as they watched through their telescopes from afar, they were surprised at how peaceful and orderly it was, gaining new respect for the Staff Sergeant that coordinated this effort. Because of the gift of shoes, the villagers now have more trust in the soldiers as well. Staff Sergeant Beaudrie is now known as the “Humanitarian” by his comrades.


All Because of Shoes...maybe a pair of shoes can change a life, AND change the world too.

The Hope of Haiti

I can understand how hard it is for us to truly comprehend what people face in the midst of their tragedy. If we cannot see it for ourselves, feel it, touch it, and experience it, it is difficult for us to completely wrap our minds around it. We can watch the news, read blogs and shed tears, maybe even open our wallets, but until we HUMANIZE it, and give it a face, a name...we simply cannot even begin to understand.

This is Woodley. He has a dynamic personality, is full of energy and loves to jump rope. For such a young boy, he has a deep, scratchy voice that cracks me up (even though I cannot understand everything he says) He loves to take charge of the situation and I can tell from watching him, he is a leader and enjoys making people laugh. He has the sweetest smile. He has a new black and white kitten that he loves to play with. He calls me "Stiffany"

He lost his Mom and Dad in the earthquake. He and his beautiful teenage sister, Darlene, live with their Aunt and Uncle now. They are blessed, because they have family that took them in and care for them, unlike so many.

For me, when I think of Haiti now....I can't help but think of Woodley. Woodley IS Haiti to me.

Haiti Distribution 4-5

And I'm home now....I should be asleep, I'm tired, my belly is full and I'm all clean and scrubbed down, but I can't seem to get there yet.

The last full day of the trip our group took about three hours and went to the coast of Haiti...only an hour away from Port Au Prince, but it felt like another world. It was beautiful, green, clean and quaint....and it is a reminder of the hope of the country, there is still so much beauty there in the midst of what seems to be overwhelming poverty and destruction. I took a single kayak out on the ocean for about an hour for $10....(now, that's the upswing there...cheap recreation) and just marveled literally at the water, the coral reefs I could see underneath me, the mountains. Breathtaking.
Our bus driver decided to take off everything but his underwear and go swimming and I found him later underneath an umbrella konked out, his dark, shiny skin covered in sand. It makes you wonder how often a beach trip is a reality for these guys...

We planned to go visit Maison Enfant de Dieu that afternoon, an orphanage in Port Au Prince that currently has about 80 children there, from infants to 9 years old. We walked in and I just knew that it would be a pivotal point in our trip. After a very quick tour of the living quarters, we all split up. I went to the toddler's room first, because I had seen a disabled girl in a play pen that I wanted to visit. She was 9 years old and had cerebral palsy. I just stroked her face and hair, we couldn't hold her. She was the size of a 5 year old. And then the band of demanding 2 year old mademoiselles found me. They were an absolute hoot, all clamoring for attention..and affection. Within minutes, they had confiscated my Blackberry and Passport, almost like the TSA. They move fast....but I got them back and settled down on the floor to play with them until one of our group members, Michelle, came in with an IPhone and upstaged me with Wet Wipes (they played with these like Barbies...they wanted you to smell them....just imagine... WET WIPES entertained them).

And I found Wilsson....he was laying on his back on the floor, he was 3 and has cerebral palsy, AND the biggest smile I have ever seen. I was able to hold him and talk to him and I put him back on his blanket and rubbed his tummy and just talked to him....he was dropped off at the orphanage when he was a baby, they do not know his whereabouts and the mayor of Haiti named him after himself. This child was a delight....I cried when I left the room because he cried and it broke my heart.

I walked down to the infant room where it was completely full of babies. Every crib was occupied. Beautiful Haitian babies that just took your heart away. Their little eyes were just glassed over....you touched them and most of them were almost in a state of shock. One little girl kept knocking the crib with the back of head, almost in a rhythmic, disturbing manner. It reminded me of articles I have read about at-risk babies and their tendencies to comfort themselves. I held one little boy for 10 minutes and he just cradled his sweet head under my chin. I really have no other words for this.....

As we got ready to leave I went out to where the older children were and our adults that were playing with them. I sat down and three little girls quickly came and started doing my hair....I gave them ponytail holders and they were going to town until one of them found my birthmark on top of my head and it freaked her out. We quickly explained to her that I was born with it and it was OK, but she switched to the other side. It was cute and amazing how quick and perceptive they are.

We left the orphanage to go back for dinner and it was pretty quiet. The experience of the orphanage for me was just emptying. I wanted to stay longer, to do something for those beautiful babies, to touch them all, and I know I couldn't....but I just cannot fathom that these babies do not have a better home. I know for them it is a lot better than most of the homes in Port Au Prince, but I can see that little girl just knocking the crib with her head, and my heart aches. One of the workers said that earlier this year they used to have visitors all of the time, but now there are a lot fewer of them. WHY? Why do we become calloused?????? THEY STILL NEED LOVE AND AFFECTION.

I am glad I'm home and that I had a hot shower, but honestly, I am a better person in Haiti. I don't look in the mirror, I don't really care what I have on, I eat whatever is before me, I get excited when kids want to jump rope, I look forward to what I can do that day to help someone. I'm better there...I want to be better here.

Haiti Day 3

Just a few thoughts before I go to bed here after another busy day. Our team traveled today to Cite Soleil, an intensely populated, impoverished area of Port Au Prince to distribute shoes to the community there. We are able to fit nearly 100 children and adults from the school and community with new shoes. The smallest child we fitted with shoes today was probably one week old. I was amazed as I fit some toddlers with shoes over the roughness of their little feet; they walk around barefoot all day, such a difference from the soft feet of little American toddlers. After the distributions, we took the group to view Haiti from the mountain overlook and take in some Haitian art and culture. We have an amazing team of individuals on this trip: 2 professional organizers, a medical transcriptionist, a leadership developer, 2 footwear corporate marketing executives, a recording artist, a law student, a devoted dad and husband and a perpetual volunteer...wow, what a crew. And its been awesome to see them in action, laying aside self and routine for a few days, and being super flexible. Its hard to explain until you do something like this, but YOU leave with much more than you came to give. We are giving out shoes and hope, yes, but the smiles, the love and gratitude we receive is truly priceless. Tonight, we jumped rope with some local children tonight, one being a young boy of about 8 who was orphaned from the earthquake, and it was truly a great experience for all. It was time spent with children without TV, phones, computers. Just laughter and smiles and community, even with a language barrier. It TIME that is most important, time you spend with anyone in need to let them know that they matter, and sometimes it involves giving something away and other times it involves giving yourself away.

Haiti Trip with Soles4Souls Day 1-2

Day 2 of our Haiti Distribution Trip proved to be busy and definitely eye-opening! We arrived last night to our mission hostel in Terre Noire and after a great dinner and a time to get to know each other as a group, off to bed we went!
This morning we set up the shoes we brought for the distribution at the School located on our Mission Compound. This school has a student body of over 500 students, and we were able to distribute shoes to every class. As the children came in this morning for school, I could definitely sense everyone's excitement about the day ahead. We spent the next 5-6 hours washing their sweet little feet and fitting them in brand new pairs of shoes, making them laugh and telling them how wonderful their new shoes were. I heard "Merci" 10,000 times and I will never tire of hearing it! While we were fitting the older elementary school classes, I think we hit the jackpot with the soccer cleats we had. The size range was perfect for them, and the boys and girls(!)wanted them (soccer is a pretty big deal in Haiti)! It was awesome to see the little girls with their gingham school dresses on, bows in their hair and cleats on their feet!
We took our group down to the Presidential Palace afterwards to see the distribution left from the earthquake nearly one year ago. There is still SO much to be done, and so much heartbreak...but the spirit of this country and of the Haitian people is so strong and so full of joy, it is absolutely amazing!
And Soles4Souls will continue to be here and make a sustainable difference here...it was awesome to pull up yesterday and have the children and teachers recognize you and call out your name. And that's because we are in it for the long haul.

Reflections on 2010

I just did something really great, and I would encourage you to do the same as well. Review 2010 for yourself, take about an hour or so and reflect on the year that just passed. I just did it and I am so very glad I did. And THEN....leave it behind. Check out Michael Hyatt's blog post on this. I just cut and pasted the questions in a Word Document and spent about an hour or so meditating and writing.

Click on this little thingee here: Seven Questions to Ask About Last Year

Happy New Year Ya'll!